Feel Free To Call Them Beautiful

If there is anything virtuous, lovely,

or of good report or praiseworthy, 

we seek after these things.

The home in which I grew up has a lovely neighbourhood view of Pike's Peak. I remember looking at that mountain and loving its beauty: in the winter (and fall, and spring, and sometimes summer) with its peak capped with snow; in the fall, laden with the orange and yellow and red of native leaves; during a thunderstorm- backlit by huge streaks of lightning. I remember the awe it inspired, and I remember wondering why it needed to be there. Sometime in my young adult life I came to the conclusion that it didn't "need" to be there. The words of the verse ring true to me: 

"When I look down from lofty mountain grandeur and hear the brook and feel the gentle breeze: Then sings my soul, My Savior, God, to Thee; How great Thou art!" 

The beauty of the Lord's natural creations is a testament to me of His love. He didn't NEED mountains in order to save me. He didn't NEED the forests and flowers and fields and beaches to save me. He didn't NEED the world to be a beautiful one in order for the power of His atoning sacrifice to be sufficient. But He created Beauty, perhaps, because He knew that I would need it. There was a time, up in a different, secluded house, in a national forest in the mountains in which I lived, when the stars in a clear sky were the only reminder I had that maybe He was still near me. Beauty has given me hope when there was no other hope and hints of joy in situations of misery.  

I value beauty. And yes, I value beauty in people. I believe that human beings are God's greatest creations, and I believe that He intended us to find each other beautiful. I find beauty in freckles, and muscles, and hair colors and styles, and eyes that smile, and symmetry and asymmetry. I find beauty in graceful movement and athletic prowess and tasteful, flattering clothing, and charming clumsiness, and the human form and figure. And I find value in the recognition of beautiful people. I love to watch people and find the outward things that make them beautiful to me.

What I don't love are societally-imposed definitions and boundaries on what physical qualities we're "supposed" to find beautiful. I don't love that we're so encouraged to be "more beautiful than" or "beautiful like." I strive to show those around me (especially my children) that beauty doesn't need to be comparative. A comparison of two people should register as apples to walruses. An apple will never be a beautiful walrus, and people should be beautiful because they ARE, not because they have smaller feet than Jennifer Aniston. I teach these ideas to my children, and I will continue to do so because I think it is important.

I've read a lot of highly popular blog posts recently about the need to recognize qualities other than physical beauty in children, especially in little girls. While I agree that it's vitally important to seek out and build up those invisible traits, I also feel the extent to which compliments on a child's appearance are sometimes demonized ignores an important gift that we are given as human beings. Physical attraction (not even in a romantic or sexual sense) is an important aspect of human interaction. I want every child to feel confident in his or her appearance, and empowered to recognize the beauty of others- in every different way in which it may manifest. There's no need to reduce the value of beauty, only a need to broaden its definition. So if you look at my children and you happen to think they are beautiful, please feel free to tell them. And trust me to teach them what that really means.